MONOLOGUE: ELEPHANT by Margie Stokley (Female, Teen, 1980)

At 17, MICHELLE is bright and direct in her group therapy session. Applying lipstick, SHE addresses the audience as the group.

MICHELLE: Hi. My name is Michelle (SHE does a crazy gesture and noise that somehow mocks suicide.) Just kidding. No, really-thrilled to be here. What do you want to know? What do you want me to say…

(Silence)

Oh, wait, that’s right. This is not a conversation-it’s a session. This is my first time to share, with complete strangers how I feel…Well, I feel like talking about trees. How do you feel about them? Wait. Please, don’t speak..let me. My fascination stems from this one tree. (SHE silently mouths “stems” again to emphasize the irony.) Rough crowd. (A pause) Well, its gigantic and right outside my bedroom window. Some nights I feel like it wants in. Wants into my perfect pink-and-white-striped room. My room is perfect, not because its everything I want. Its just perfectly planned, the pillows, the balloon shades, the pictures, the bed, the window seat, my stuffed animals. I have even more animals under my bed. I have guilt about suffocating them…I feel…it doesn’t matter. They don’t match. (A pause) They really don’t. Well, it cant fall now because I just predicted it. What you think is going to happen – never does. It’s a relief. You cant know it all. I just feel like in my movie that’s what will happen. There’ll be a huge thunderstorm with lightning, my tree will explode, and I’ll be crushed. I can see myself split in half. I don’t want to be surrounded by all those people who would need to be there if I got crushed. I am over groups. No offense.